Amasu okuguqula ukuziphatha (ingxenye II)

Ngemva kwencazelo yangoLwesibili yokuguqulwa kokuziphatha, namuhla ngizoqhubeka nokuchaza amasu ahlukene okuguqula ukuziphatha kwezingane zakho. Khumbula ukuthi ungasebenzisa indlela eyodwa wedwa noma ngokuhlanganiswa, nokuthi kufanele uqine ezinqumweni zakho.

Ngithemba ukuthi uzothola ziwusizo.

INDLELA YOKUPHUMA KWESIKHATHI.

Le ndlela imelela ukuhlukahluka kweyangaphambilini uma nje kuyindlela Ngokuyisisekelo isebenzisa ukuhoxiswa kokunakaNgakho-ke, izimiso eziningi ezibekwe lapho ziyasebenza lapha, kodwa zinezincazelo ezithile.

Uma kwenzeka ukukhala, ukucasuka, noma ukwenza okubi kakhulu (isibonelo, lapho kwenzeka ukulahlekelwa ukulawula), ingasetshenziswa inqubo "yokuphumula"Lokhu kuhilela ukususa ingane ngokoqobo endaweni yayo yamanje bese uyiyisa ekamelweni layo noma kwenye indawo isikhathi esifushane. Ngaphandle kwalokho, abazali bangazisusa bona endaweni yengane (uma kungenzeka, isibonelo, ekamelweni lokudlela).

Ake sibheke ezinye iziqondiso zokuqhubeka ngendlela efanele:

1. Isayithi lapho sisusa khona okwesikhashana Kufanele kube yindawo lapho engenakho ukufinyelela emidlalweni noma kwezinye izinto zokuzijabulisa.Akukhona ukumthola indawo enobutha, kodwa indawo enesithukuthezi futhi amathuba okuthi angakwazi ukwenza noma yini ukuze adlulise isikhathi awekho.
2. Kumelwe tukumdlulisela ngokushesha ngemva kokuba ukuziphatha kuvele noma lapho sekufinyelele eqophelweni elingazinzile (isibonelo, impikiswano phakathi kwabafowabo nodadewabo efinyelela ezingeni lokulahlekelwa ukulawula).
3. Ungaphikisani nayeUngasebenzisi amagama ahlambalazayo noma ahlambalazayo njengokuthi, "Umubi kakhulu futhi ngizokujezisa," noma "Ngikhathele nguwe, awunathemba..." Kunalokho, ungachaza isizathu sokukhishwa kwakho ngaphandle ngezwi elizolile kodwa eliqinile neliqinile. Ukuze wenze lokhu, chaza isikhalazo sakho ngokucacile: "Njengoba ushaye umfowenu omncane, ngeke ukwazi ukudlala ngaye." Unganaki noma yimiphi imibhikisho noma izithembiso. Khumbula ukubonakala uthukuthele, kodwa hhayi ungenaso isiqondiso. Umqondo uwukuthumela umlayezo ocacile wokuthi wenze into engalungile nokuthi simthukuthelele. Kulokhu, futhi kafushane kakhulu, ungasho into efana nale (ukulungisa umlayezo ukuze uvumelane nobudala bomntwana): "Ungidumaze kakhulu kangangokuthi angifuni ukuba nawe njengamanje. Ngizizwa ngidabukile kakhulu."
4. Ungamvumeli ukuthi aphume endaweni yokuzihlukanisa ngaphambi kwesikhathi. Uma enza kanjalo, mxwayise ngemiphumela emibi eyengeziwe, njengokudingeka ahlale kulesi simo isikhathi eside.
5. Isikhathi sokuhlukaniswa ngokuvamile Kubalwa ngokusekelwe kumzuzu owodwa ngonyaka wengane, lapho umkhawulo ufinyelela ku-20 imizuzu. Kodwa-ke, lokhu kufanele kuhlolwe ngabazali. Akukhuthazwa ukuthi izingane zihlale isikhathi eside ngoba zingadala okuphambene nalokho esifuna ukukuqeda.
6. Uma, lapho siyomlanda, ephinda enza ukuziphatha okungafanele, kumelwe simxwayise ukuthi uma efuna ukuphuma, kumelwe agweme ukwenza lokho okungenani imizuzwana eyi-15. Hlala uqinile esinqumweni sakho. Uma uphumelela esivivinyweni, iziqephu cishe zizophela; uma uvuma, cishe zizokwanda.
7. En uma kwenzeka ukuthi kubangele umonakalo ngaphakathi kwegumbi labagibeli (okonakele noma ophule okuthile) kumele akushintshe noma akulungise ngesenzo esithile ngaphambi kokuhamba.
8. Kumelwe siqaphele ukuthi lokhu kuhoxa ngokomzimba akunikezi nzuzo engaqondile enganeni. Isibonelo, uma ingane ikwazi ukuyeka ukufunda noma igweme ukudla into engayithandi, sizobe siqinisa ukuziphatha okungafanele.

Le ndlela ivame ukuba

isebenza kahle kakhulu uma isetshenziswa kahle futhi ngokuzimisela.

Ukuphumelela kwale ndlela, kungakhathaliseki ukuthi sisusa ukunaka, kulele eqinisweni lokuthi siyabangela, kuncike ekubonakaleni kokuziphatha okungafuneki, okunye "kokukhathazeka kobuntwana" okuvame kakhulu: ukukhathazeka ngokuhlukana. Ngisho noma ingane isikhulile ngokwanele ukwazi ukuthi ngeke ilahlwe ngempela, ukuphinda ikhathazeke ngalokhu kukhathazeka kungabangela intukuthelo yangaphakathi. Lokho engase ikwesabe manje akukhona ukuhlukana ngokomzimba kodwa ukuhlukana ngokomzwelo. Ngakho-ke, ingane izolungisa ukuziphatha kwayo kwamanje nokwesikhathi esizayo hhayi ngezizathu zabazali kodwa ngenxa yazo (ukwesaba ukulahlekelwa ukwesekwa ngokomzwelo kwabazali bayo).

Njengazo zonke izindlela ezisekelwe ekuhoxiseni ukunaka, khumbula ukuthi izikhathi zokunaka ingane kufanele zifakwe kuye ngokubonakala kokuziphatha okufiselekayo. Ukuqinisa ngamazwi nangokomzimba (ukudumisa, ukugona, ukukhombisa injabulo, ukunikeza umvuzo, njll.) kubalulekile.

UMNOTHO WAMATHOKENI. IZINDLEKO ZEZIMPENDULO.

Akusizi nhlobo uma ingane ithola izipho noma amathoyizi kalula naphezu kokubonisa ukuziphatha okuphazamisayo noma okungalaleli. Njengengxenye yokwelashwa okuphelele, le ndlela eyaziwa ngokuthi... "umnotho wethokheni" Ngokuvamile kusebenza kahle kakhulu ukulawula ukusekelwa ingane ekutholayo. Ukuwina umklomelo (ithoyizi, uhambo oluya epaki yetimu, uhambo, njll.) kumele enze uchungechunge lwezindlela zokuziphatha ezifiselekayo (noma bayeke ukwenza abanye) okumele kucaciswe (baziphathe kahle, balalele, batadishe, balungise izinto zabo, njll.).

Ngemva kokwenza lokhu kuziphatha, kuzonikezwa i-reinforcer ngokushesha. (amaphuzu, amathokheni…) ingane ezowaqoqa ize ifinyelele inani elithile, lapho izothola khona umvuzo wokugcina. Imivuzo emincane, esheshayo ingavunyelwana ngayo ngezindlela ezithile zokuziphatha ezifiselekayo ngenkathi amaphuzu eqongelelwa umklomelo omkhulu (ukuqiniswa okubambezelekile). Into ebalulekile ukwenza ingane iqaphele ukuthi ithola izinzuzo namalungelo amakhulu ngokuziphatha ngendlela efanele.

Ake sibheke amaphuzu athile abalulekile okusebenza kahle:

1. Le miklomelo kumele kuvunyelwane ngayo kusenesikhathi.Khuluma ngokucacile futhi ukhange ingane. Funa izinto ezithanda ngempela (akusizi ukwenza sengathi izowina into eyidingayo, njengamapensela amasha esikoleni).
2. Qiniseka ukuthi ungazithola kalula ekuqaleni ukuze umkhuthazeUkunikezwa kwale miklomelo kufanele kuhambisane nokunconywa okuqotho njengokuthi "Ngijabule kakhulu," "wenza kahle kakhulu...," futhi, kusobala, akufanele neze kuhambisane nezinkulumo ezimbi njengokuthi "ake sibone ukuthi lokhu kuzothatha isikhathi esingakanani..." Uma ingane encane noma ingahlaliseki kakhulu, isikhathi sokuhlolwa kokuziphatha kufanele sibe sifushane (ukuthembisa okuthile uma iphumelela ezifundweni ezinyangeni ezintathu ngeke kusebenze).
3. Uma kwenzeka ezinganeni ezikhuthele ngokweqile, khumbula ukuthi kunobunzima obukhulu ekukuhlehliseni izinto. Kuzo zonke lezi zimo, uma ithokheni inikezwa njengesiqinisekisi, ingashintshwa (okungenani ekuqaleni) ngokushesha ngento ingane eyifunayo (ithoyizi elincane, amaswidi, njll.). Inqubo efanayo kufanele ilandelwe ezinganeni ezikhubazekile ngokwengqondo.
4. Kubalulekile ukudala uhlu noma iphosta lapho isimo samaphuzu atholiwe kanye nalawo adingekayo ukuze kufinyelelwe umklomelo kungabonakala khona, uma kubambezeleka ngokwecebo elibekiwe. Uma kwenzeka Ukuvela kokuziphatha kabi kungabandakanya nokususwa kwabanye yamaphuzu (izindleko zempendulo).
5. Sebenzisa le ndlela njalo futhi ungacasuki lapho uqala ukuhluleka. Kuthatha isikhathi ukushintsha imikhuba emibi futhi azikho izixazululo zomlingo.
6. Khumbula ukuthi lapho unikeza ingane yakho imiyalelo, kufanele ukwenze lokho ngokucacile nangokufushane, ngaphandle kokuphikisana, nangendlela eqondakalayo ngokweminyaka yayo.Zama ukungakwenzi lokho kuhambisana nokukhuthaza ukuthintana ngokomzimba (ukusetshenziswa kokukhuthaza kuye kwabonakala kuyisikhuthazo esikhulu sokungalandeli imithetho).

Lezi zindlela zivame ukusebenza kahle kakhulu ekuphatheni ukuziphatha ekhaya nasesikoleni. Umgomo akukhona ukuthi ingane ifunde ukuziphatha ngemivuzo kuphela, kodwa kunalokho ukuyinika izizathu zokushintsha ukuziphatha kwayo. Okulindelekile ukuthi, esikhathini esizayo, ukuziphatha okufanele kuzogcinwa hhayi ngemivuzo, kodwa ngalokho esikubiza ngokuthi "iziqinisi zemvelo." Isibonelo, ingane ingase iqale igweme ukuziphatha okuthile okuphazamisayo ukuze ithole umvuzo, kodwa lolu shintsho ekuziphatheni lungaholela ekuxhumaneni okungcono nabangani, futhi esikhathini esiphakathi, lokhu kuba yisiqinisi esinamandla kakhulu kunomvuzo wokuqala. Ukuziphatha kube sekulawulwa yimiphumela emihle ekhiqizwa endaweni yayo.

Fuentes:

• ZQUIERDO, A. (1988): Ukusetshenziswa kwezindlela namasu ekwelapheni ukuziphatha, Promolibro.
• KOZLOFF, MA (1980): Ukufunda nokuziphatha ebuntwaneni. Izinkinga nokwelashwa, Fontanella.
• UMARTOS, J. (1984): Abazali bafundisa futhi: umhlahlandlela osebenzayo, i-APNA.
• RIBES, E. (1972): Amasu okuguqula ukuziphatha. Ukusetshenziswa kwawo ekubambezelekeni kokuthuthukiswa, eTrillas, eMexico.