Why establish rules and limits?

While the rules These are rules that determine our behavior, our social relationships and coexistence. limits They define the limits of our behavior so as not to interfere with that of others.

So that cEach age or period in our child's life requires rules and limitsLogically, the expectations for a child are not the same as those for a teenager: we cannot ask a one-year-old to participate in household routines and behave in a certain way at the table, which is what we would expect from a teenager. Therefore, The rules and limits will be established. as our child progresses in his development process, as well as the requirement of compliance with them.

Why should we establish rules and limits?

• for health reasons
• for security reasons
• for reasons of cohabitation
• to live in harmony
• for moral values.

Choosing our own rules:

We must to establish the rules that should govern our family and that of our childrenThe choice will be based on what our parents passed on to us and what we have developed throughout our lives, as well as those of the society in which we live.

Throughout our experience as parents, we've surely encountered the difficulty of getting our children to follow the rules we teach them. There are things we can do to make them obey, and to do so, we'll consider the following points.

• We must be understanding: Rules and boundaries must be established clearly and understandably: We must consider how to give specific and clear instructions. Children and teenagers need to hear and know exactly what behavior is expected of them.
• We will let our children express themselves: Children, and especially teenagers, appreciate being consulted when setting limits. When children cooperate, they are more likely to obey. However, listening to them doesn't mean we have to agree with them and change the rules. Therefore, we can establish some rules and limits with them, while others we will have to establish ourselves, fulfilling our responsibility as parents.
• We will explain why.Children and teenagers tend to obey rules and limits more when they understand the reasons behind them: "You can't go out this weekend because..." is a rule without explanation, whereas "You can't stay up late this weekend because you have an exam on Monday" includes an explanation. Knowing that there is a logical explanation behind every rule and limit will help our children obey us.
• Establish them before applying them: We will try not to implement unexpected rules. We will do our best to ensure our children know the rules before breaking them. How is our child supposed to know they can't ride a bike in the city or stay out late the night before an exam if we haven't told them beforehand? Our children need to know the rules and boundaries in advance.
• We will remind you of them periodically.Children and teenagers sometimes forget the rules. If we notice that our child has forgotten a rule, we won't wait for problems to arise; we'll gently remind them. But if our child forgets it more than two or three times and our reminders become routine, we'll try to understand what's happening and act reasonably, firmly, and consistently.
• Better positive than negative: Whenever possible, we will try to make our rules positive rather than negative. This helps children clearly understand correct behavior. Examples: "You can play ball outside" instead of "Don't play ball inside" or "Wash your hands before sitting down at the table" instead of "Don't come to the table with dirty hands."

We must be aware that rules, limits, and discipline are a very important factor in building personality.

Resources: